What if you’re not great at introducing yourself to people, developing friendships or making small talk? Are you doomed to sit at home feeling isolated with your newborn – but overwhelmed by the thought of baby groups and coffee catch-ups? Is the village just for extroverted mothers?
Every mum’s village is as unique as her.
In parenthood, there are big villages, and small villages too. There are villages with a lot of movement and activity, and calm little villages where things take a while to happen.
One mum might feel isolated and lonely if she doesn’t have a social interaction at least once a day. For another mum, a social interaction every day might feel overwhelming and intrusive.
Building your village, as a new mother, is about so much more than going out and making lots of new friends.
It’s about knowing where your local mums groups meet – even if you only go once a month.
It’s about knowing which cafes within walking distance are baby friendly.
It’s about knowing there are at least two people you feel comfortable seeing you half-naked and covered in baby vomit.
It’s about knowing you can spend all day napping, feeding, and eating, and not have to worry about housework.
Building your village means creating relationships that make you feel safe, loved and supported.
When I work with expectant couples at my workshops, or with newborn mothers in their homes, I help them identify what their ideal village might look like. Then we work together to build it. When a newborn mother feels safe, loved and supported in her community, she experiences lifelong benefits (and her family benefits too).
For example, one mum might need lots of people around her, while another might need to limit her social interactions to one or two a week. One mum thrives on a noisy, cheerful house, the other craves silence. One mum enjoys spending time with other parents and babies, another wants to develop strong relationships with trusted babysitters.
Your village is as unique as you are.
As a mother, what would your ideal village look like?
When women are nourished and nurtured after giving birth, they feel calm, connected and confident. My passion is to provide this high level of postnatal support to women in Canberra and worldwide. I guide expectant parents to create a vision for life with baby, and give them the practical tools to make their vision a reality.